Six weeks of work, in one weekend

Weekend Couples Intensive

Some couples can't wait six weeks for things to shift, or can't fit weekly sessions around time zones, travel and the rest of their lives. So they fly in, and we do it in one weekend. Twelve hours, Friday afternoon to Sunday, focused entirely on the two of you. It's intensive. Most couples leave exhausted. They also leave knowing what has really been happening between them, and what to do about it.

Ask About Available Weekends

For couples who need momentum

The weekend suits couples who:

Live far away, or across time zones that make weekly sessions hard
Have demanding, public or unpredictable schedules
Feel stuck at a turning point and don't want to wait months for clarity
Want privacy, away from home, work and the people who know them

It's for couples who want to spend less time catching up, and more time doing the deep rewiring. In weekly sessions, the start of every hour goes to what happened since last time. Over a weekend, that time goes into the work itself, and nothing has a chance to cool down between sessions.

How the weekend runs

Before you arrive.

You each complete online questionnaires, so we start with real information rather than from zero.

Friday afternoon, together (about 2 hours).

We begin the assessment. I get a feel for how you two relate: the dynamic, not just the complaint.

Saturday morning, separately.

An individual session with each of you. Your history, your patterns, and the things you might not say in front of each other yet.

Saturday afternoon, together.

Feedback. I bring together what the questionnaires and our time so far have shown, and we name what's really going on.

Sunday morning, separately (about an hour to an hour and a half each).

Working on what we found, one at a time.

Sunday afternoon, together (2 to 3 hours).

Bringing it back into the room between you, and mapping the way forward.

About twelve hours in all. Roughly what six weeks of weekly couples sessions would hold.

We always break for two hours at lunch, so you can rest and eat, and I can prepare for the afternoon.

After the weekend

You get free access to the Love, in Real Life Toolbox, so you can keep practising the tools we worked with. If you want to keep going, we continue online, building on what the assessment found.

The practical part

The weekend is $5,000 and covers the sessions only. You arrange your own travel, accommodation and meals, and book a private meeting room for the weekend. Most couples choose a hotel with a conference facility, so they can step straight from the room upstairs into the work and back again. Everything we discuss is confidential. Most couples fly into Cape Town and drive about 90 minutes to Hermanus, where I'm based. I'm happy to suggest places that have worked well for other couples. If you've been apart for a while, separate rooms can take some of the pressure off. I can also come to you, anywhere in the world. In that case, my flights, accommodation, meals and travel time are added to the weekend price. Coming from far? A week-long intensive gives the work more room, with time to rest and explore in between. Ask me about it. Questions, or want to know the next available weekend? Write to me and I'll come back to you with dates.

A weekend this concentrated asks a lot of both of you. If there's active domestic violence or coercive control in your relationship, this isn't the right setting, and I'd rather tell you that honestly than take your time and money. Please reach out to a service built for that first.

A few honest questions

Is one weekend really enough?

It's enough to understand what's actually going on and to start working on it, which is often where couples have been stuck for years. Some couples find the weekend is what they needed. Others carry on with sessions afterwards.

What if we're not sure we want to stay together?

The weekend won't decide that for you. It will show you what's underneath the conflict, so whatever you decide next, you decide it more clearly.

Do we both need to come?

Yes. This is couples work, and the individual sessions only work when you're both there.

It was truly one of the most powerful, intense and significant experiences of my life. You helped my husband and me turn our approach to each other around, 180 degrees. Whatever we decide, wherever we go from here, I know we can now approach it with love and compassion, rather than blame and resentment.
MS, South Africa

Ready to talk about a weekend?

Tell me a little about where you are and when you're hoping to come. I'll come back to you with available dates.

Ask About Available Weekends